In our minds coexists many natural voices, the interaction of which makes the inner life interesting and bright. Everyone can find in himself the voice of the inner critic, who serves as a defender, makes judgments and gives comments, most of which will never be spoken out loud. In addition, there are voices that track other people’s reactions, assess our physical health, calculate how much time is left to perform a particular task, and report on current feelings. There are many other voices – and all of them are natural elements of consciousness and are responsible for performing various tasks, making choices and adapting to the requirements of everyday life.
In the case of obsessive thoughts, three voices are of particular importance. What they say and how they interact creates unpleasant images and prevents them from disappearing. We hope to simplify the observation of these processes in your mind, giving illustrative examples. This will help you to start a new way of dealing with your thoughts and relieve suffering.
So, we present to you the voices that can be called: the Restless voice, the Voice of false calm and the Voice of wisdom. In the course of reading this book you will get acquainted with various dialogues and comments with the participation of these voices. Each of the voices sends you a lot of messages. Our task is to help you understand how best to deal with them when they appear and invade your mind.
Let’s start with the Restless voice – the voice of frightening fantasies. A troubled voice is a voice asking, “What if?”He voiced fears and doubts, as well as false conclusions, predicting tragedies and terrible consequences. This voice may seem irrational, strange and even perverted or completely insane. Sometimes a Restless voice gives suspicious warnings or requires urgent action. It interferes with, annoys, scares and mind. A restless voice provokes anxiety and is often the first to respond to obsessive thoughts or new sensations.
Following entering into a dialogue the Voice of false calmness. He inevitably responds to the question “What if?”, which sets a Restless voice. This question disturbs the Voice of false calm, and he tries to get rid of discomfort. This voice is called so because, that never reaches its goal. He often gives temporary relief and the illusion of rationality, but he could not completely stifle a Troubled voice. It has the opposite effect. The voice of false peace is almost always merely adds to the speculation and doubts of a Troubled voice. The voice of false calm is so alarmed and frightened by the Restless voice that it consciously tries to argue, to control, to avoid, to suppress, to admonish, to argue, to neutralize, or to circumvent everything the Restless voice says. The voice of false calm tries its best, but ultimately fails in attempts to eliminate the anxiety disorder. Often he becomes angry at the Troubled voice or ashamed of it and dreams of being able to just turn around and walk away. He feared that the thoughts that voiced a Troubled voice, testify to the madness, danger, irritation, distortion, loss of control or that he is disgusting. When obsessive thoughts arise, the Restless voice and the Voice of false calm inevitably begin to argue. This dispute is an integral part of any obsessive thought.
Such a reaction in the form of disputes between a Restless voice and a Voice of false calm can be the most painful part of obsessive thoughts.
Finally, let us welcome the Voice of wisdom, which from afar watches the incessant disputes of the Restless voice and the Voice of false calm, saying almost nothing. The voice of wisdom is calm, unemotional and impartial. He knows that the Restless voice cannot cope on its own, and the Voice of false calm is sure that it helps. But the Voice of wisdom knows that the Voice of false calm unconsciously provokes a Restless voice – and the debate continues again. The voice of wisdom, on the contrary, is free, makes no effort and accepts uncertainty. He is curious and sometimes even happy that upsets others.
The voice of wisdom shows awareness and compassion. Awareness is a state of openness and active attention to what is happening at every moment. It involves observing one’s own thoughts, feelings and feelings without making any judgments or assessments. A conscious attitude becomes possible because some part of your personality is able to pull away and look at the experience impartially. In the future, we will show that a conscious attitude is extremely useful for the release of obsessive thoughts, and explain how to apply this attitude when the need arises. Here is an example of how three voices react to a thought.
Restless voice: This kitten is so touching and defenseless. What if I strangle him? It’s so easy to do.
The voice of false calm: You would never do that!
Restless voice: Look, my hands can just wrap around his neck.
The voice of false calm: don’t be silly. You are kind and gentle!
Restless voice: Who knows? Yesterday I had an attack of aggression when I was driving. What if I can’t help myself?
A voice of false calm: You just got angry; you didn’t do anything. Just stop thinking about it. That won’t happen.
Restless voice: Everything happens for the first time and I’m worried if everything is OK with me. Would I have had such thoughts if everything had been all right?
A voice of false calm: Just think of something else. It’s time to leave the kitten alone. This is crazy! You have crazy thoughts.
Troubled voice: So you one is, I have crazy thought?
Voice of wisdom: Let me intervene. It’s just a thought. I’m watching you guys fight. I follow your arguments. I see that the longer you argue, the more upset you get and the more it becomes like a real problem that needs attention. This is just a random thought that can arise in everyone and in fact does not mean anything. What if you just leave her alone? Let thoughts be just thoughts.
Impartially observe the internal dispute of the vote. It will improve your condition.